My previous post made me think about all of the messages we get from pop culture that promote edginess and anti-feminine messages. Many of these messages have influenced me in the past, but now that I know what they are I won't let them alter my attitudes or behaviour. These are some examples that stand out for me.
- Action films: I truly enjoy action movies but I know that I have to inoculate myself from wanting to be like the heroines. I loved Columbiana (starring Zoe Saldana) and any movies where women kicked the bad guys where the sun doesn't shine. But I was strongly influenced by Linda Hamilton in Terminator 2. She had muscular arms in that movie and it influenced me to start lifting weights and trying to be buff (and non-feminine). In the film she was so masculine and was unable to be nurturing to her son at all. Awesome movie but why did I admire that? It didn't help that entertainment shows were talking about how great they thought Linda looked. Her character could have easily been played by a man. I will continue to enjoy the films but I won't fantasize about beating people up.
- Action/adventure/sci-fi television shows: I loved Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Alias, and La Femme Nikita. On these shows the heroines were constantly fighting, using guns, and saving people (including men). Because of Buffy I actually considered learning martial arts (not just for self-defense). I have to remember, I do not have to be a protector and I do not have to fight. I'll let the men do that.
- Athletic commercials: These advertisements almost always have anti-feminine messages. You may have seen a recent one where a woman is actually competing with a man flipping tires, climbing ropes and things like that (I couldn't find the commercial but this VIDEO makes the same point). Why do women have to compete with men in sport and exercise? I remember when I used to lift weights that I felt proud that I could lift the same dumb bells as some of the men. I was the dumb bell because I wasn't doing myself any favours. I don't want to box, play hockey, or be a power lifter. I'll stick to my cardio, light weightlifting, calisthenics, and dancing.
- Music videos: Most Western music videos for pop, alternative, or hip hop music show women with edge and attitude. Maybe videos for ballads might be softer. It isn't news that the videos are too sexy but I haven't heard anyone complain about the edginess. In fact, the videos seem to be edgy on purpose. For instance, take Lily Allen. She wears feminine dresses but she curses like a sailor. Or anything from Avril Lavigne. Even when women in videos are dressed in super feminine clothes they always have a bad attitude! It's like it's not okay to just be nice, sweet, pretty, and romantic...they have to have an attitude! Of course, even the lyrics are not befitting a lady. I wanted to post Avril's "Smile" video but there was actually cursing in it. Any video where a woman curses, sings about her sexual exploits, or sings about beating people up is not for me. Notice in the video that she pushes the "nice girls" away! These videos also shows my point : (warning there is foul language, crude lyrics, and degrading images in this documentary) Video1, Video2.
- Catty television shows: I have watched some of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, but I have heard that all the Real Housewives shows, Basketball Wives, and Love and Hip Hop shows are similar. The women in the shows may have money and expensive clothes but they lack class, education, sophistication, and good manners. They curse and get into physical fights! I avoid these shows like the plague. I avoid most reality shows anyway. There is nothing I need to learn from Jersey Shore or Teen Moms. These shows are pure poison! I haven't seen Desperate Housewives, Gossip Girl, Pretty Little Liars, or shows like that because I haven't been into that type of drama for a while. From what I have heard they have women scheming and acting very catty. It might be good entertainment but I would have to remind myself that this is not model female behaviour before I watch.
- Romantic comedies: It may seem strange to put this on the list, but there are a lot of mixed messages in romantic comedies. For instance, sometimes the female lead chases the guy and they often have sex on the first date or way too early. If the woman is the focus of the movie sometimes she drinks, smokes, and has other masculine traits. But if the man is the focus it is usually a very feminine woman! Well, that's what comes to my mind but I haven't been watching too many of these films. I just remember "Going the Distance" was like that so my opinion on this one might be inaccurate. But I guess all women are different and there is a guy for every woman even if they do have some bad habits and masculine traits. Do you know what's funny...remember that scene in the "Breakfast Club" where Alley Sheedy gets a makeover from melancholic emo girl to girly girl? For a long time I actually preferred her melancholic look but now I prefer the made-over look!
- Fashion magazines: Yes, the magazines made by women for women are full of edginess and anti-feminine messages! I think my previous post demonstrates that many of the fashions displayed in these magazines are androgynous and unflattering to a feminine body. Their fashions don't not look good on women with curves and don't look so great on emaciated models either. Maybe it's because most of the designers are males who are not attracted to females? I have the feeling that the Asian styles I like are designed by women. Plus, in the magazines the women often look bored, like they are on heroine, unhappy, overly sexual, or like they have an attitude. It's rare to see anyone smiling or looking happy at all. It's all about edge and looking unnatural. I found a magazine a couple of days ago and that was what I noticed about it. I don't read fashion magazines (I don't buy magazines anymore) and I haven't for years because they tend to have a negative effect on women's body image. These videos demonstrate my point: Video1, Video2, Video3, Video4.
