Feeling Guilty About Last Post

I'm feeling conflicted again. On the one hand I want to be pleasant and ladylike, I don't want to say negative things, and I don't want to argue. But I don't like it when people are picked on, and if my group is picked on I think it is practically my duty to speak up. It's funny, but I only ever argue with people online on blogs or YouTube because in real life no one is saying racist things in my presence. I don't see Black men standing up in the street insulting Black women. No one I work with has ever said the hurtful things that Black women bashers do. So if I criticize them, am I being like them or am I fighting a bully to make them stop? If they stopped or YouTube stopped them then I would stop. I didn't start this, they did, but that sounds childish doesn't it?

HOWEVER, a lady is not a doormat and does not tolerate being disrespected. She does not allow men to disrespect her and that is exactly what I am doing. Is it unfair for me to criticize these men based on their personal characteristics? Maybe. I guess I was trying to prove that they should be pointing the finger at themselves instead of all Black women. I could do a post about their arguments, but actually, I don't even want to talk about them anymore, they are not the focus of this blog! I guess I was irritated and maybe I shouldn't blog angry (but angry blogs are sometimes the best aren't they?). Well on their videos and blogs I do focus on the points they are making.

I admit, I do enjoy arguing with them on their videos because really, they aren't very smart and I think I described them correctly below (that wasn't nice). So do I have to be a lady ALL the time or can I be bad when I'm online? I guess if I'm bad online that won't help the reputation of Black women will it? I will come off as a loud, angry Black woman. I want to be consistent about the person I'm trying to be. I can't just be nice in real life and have an attitude online...well, people do act differently depending on the situation. Oh, what would Claire Huxtable do? Who knows, they didn't even have the internet back then so maybe she would act exactly the way I do.

Okay, I've decided I am going to leave these posts up and see what happens. If I get other people saying it's wrong I will take it down. I still want to comment on videos though to show these men they are wrong. Actually based on my comments one of these men asked me and other women how to do constructive videos and I haven't seen any more negative ones from him. That shows commenting can change some of these men. Anyway, once I get busier I won't have time for the videos.

So what do you think? Maybe I shouldn't care or spend time thinking about this, but it actually helps distract me from stressors in my offline life.