What I don't understand is how some women complain about being treated like unfeeling pack mules and yet continue to act like unfeeling pack mules. Why don't you just stop it? If everyone thinks you are strong, you can take everything, and you actually like drama and arguing...why do you play into those assumptions? Why do you complain over and over about mammys and mules and then proudly conform to those very stereotypes? Putting up with disrespect doesn't mean you are strong, it just means you have no problem with being treated badly and that's sad. Get your mind out of Blackistan! Why don't you tell people you need help, you can't handle everything, and you don't want to be on the defensive all the time? Why don't you just start acting softer? If you want something to change then you have to change something!
Well some women will say that acting softer will make them weak and vulnerable and people will take advantage of them. Understand I said soft--not stupid. Being soft means you actually raise your standards and require better treatment from others. You don't even give anyone the chance to harm you. You can be soft and pleasant and still say no, in fact, you don't have to argue or fight at all because you don't need to expose your precious mind to negativity. You do not have to tolerate being treated like a mule for one second because you are no mule! You are a lady and must always be treated as such.
Let others accept poor treatment because they somehow convinced themselves this proves they are "mature" and "real women". If they feel proud about how much abuse they can take, let them. In the meantime, enjoy the freedom, peacefulness, joy, and serenity of being soft and cherished :)
One thing that may be hard to overcome is Judgement. At least for me, judgement, has been a challenged. Knowing that everyone else will remain the same (i.e. Harsh, bitter, impolite) is hard when you have high standards. It makes me disaapointed. If you have any tips...
ReplyDeleteLee
I really like this one because it took me back to a place where I thought being strong was a good thing. This was a reminder for me to not go back to that place.
ReplyDeleteIt's such a joy to be treated with respect and love.
Raising my standards for the way people, especially men, treat me was the best decision I've ever made. Even black men treat me better and that's a big deal since they were the ones that treated me the worse when I was trying to be strong.
"If everyone thinks you are strong, you can take everything,and you actually like drama and arguing".
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with this observation. Alot of people fail to realize we attract what we project out in world whether it is positive or negative energy.
It is our responsibility to always strive to channel postive thoughts and actions in order to get positive outlooks and responses.
I actually experienced this myself. I remember when I was in a group of people...a few of the guys were loud and using bad language. I looked up, wide-eyed and turning red. One of the guys caught my expression and said, "Oh sorry." And stopped cussing around me. The other girls they continued to. It got to where if I gave them a stern look they'd stop. No cussing, no trying to get in my face. None of that. The thing is, I didn't even KNOW these guys!
ReplyDeleteAnother example was when I was in gym playing volleyball. One girl got hit in the stomach and no one came to see if she was okay. I did. Then I got hit and they came to make sure I was okay. I was pretty surprised. So yeah, being sweet and soft does get you places ^^