tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post7352913753234997781..comments2024-01-29T01:52:28.701-05:00Comments on The New Elegant Black Woman: Remember when Being Feminine and Girly was a Black Thing?Elegancehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-11787275156504811022017-03-30T16:01:32.971-04:002017-03-30T16:01:32.971-04:00I think you make some thought-provoking points. I ...I think you make some thought-provoking points. I don't agree that BW were never girly because slavery. That argument creates a gap ignoring everything from Abolition straight on to the 70s. I think it may have been the androgyny of fashions and hairstyles of the 1970s. May have been a factor. I thnk another factor may have been the upsurgence of anti-establishment Black Nationalism (not just in the US), where women demanded and became the footsoldiers to the cause. Oekmamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14615274321133763191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-64849892691779198102017-01-08T14:15:03.669-05:002017-01-08T14:15:03.669-05:00Omg I wish I could kiss this post. This is too tru...Omg I wish I could kiss this post. This is too true. I choose to be girly and feminine and there seems to be like 0 black women who dress the same. It seems as though black women ALWAYS reject femininity and then wonder why its hard to find a man. Lol look at yourself . I just wish more black girls like myself would accept being more feminine and embracing it not just for the wrong reasons.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03800758055464628402noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-15974428316861038302014-11-19T08:40:36.824-05:002014-11-19T08:40:36.824-05:00I deeply appreciate your contributions to the cult...I deeply appreciate your contributions to the culture of Black American thinking. As a father and a man thank you...Dawn Wolfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08086175833655200949noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-64292988528322313462012-09-22T18:38:59.041-04:002012-09-22T18:38:59.041-04:00Anonymous I'm going to refer you to this post ...Anonymous I'm going to refer you to this post http://elegantblackwoman.blogspot.ca/2012/09/why-are-you-bothering-me-about-my.html<br /><br />and end this conversation. Any further comments from you on this post will be deleted. Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-39653095400507510392012-09-22T17:38:48.607-04:002012-09-22T17:38:48.607-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-69714409546207920502012-09-22T16:44:50.975-04:002012-09-22T16:44:50.975-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-67118216474933562512012-09-22T16:24:23.725-04:002012-09-22T16:24:23.725-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-87809221989827816902012-09-22T16:04:16.987-04:002012-09-22T16:04:16.987-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-87190691508416407782012-09-22T15:44:43.954-04:002012-09-22T15:44:43.954-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-86551471645153332402012-09-22T15:25:03.347-04:002012-09-22T15:25:03.347-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-54143082367209204112012-09-22T15:20:06.654-04:002012-09-22T15:20:06.654-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-1886338250059755892012-09-22T14:54:31.672-04:002012-09-22T14:54:31.672-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-28280986399915179392012-09-22T14:24:16.893-04:002012-09-22T14:24:16.893-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-46306892750886344872012-09-22T08:15:04.403-04:002012-09-22T08:15:04.403-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-8753800098156704492012-04-19T22:32:49.181-04:002012-04-19T22:32:49.181-04:00"Masculine" and "feminine" are..."Masculine" and "feminine" are social constructs; their meanings change depending on the culture.<br /><br />I see nothing wrong with women who want to dress "masculine" or who don't dress in the stereotypically feminine manner.<br /><br />I understand that "femininity" is nothing but a social construct but I enjoy dressing in skirts, dresses, etc. BUT I will not say that somehow better than another female-identified person who does not dress in this way.<br />When I read this, I couldn't help but think that the message this article is sending is that if you're a female-identified person of color and you dress outside of what our culture deems as feminine, you're doing the community a disservice.<br /><br />I would advocate for people dressing in ways that they feel comfortable and empower them. For some people, it's skirts, dresses, etc. and for others it's pants, oxfords,suits, bow ties, etc.PensiveFashionistahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11336102105425606108noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-47023586744330978502012-04-13T22:52:39.221-04:002012-04-13T22:52:39.221-04:00I forgot to add that the cover with Oprah and Mich...I forgot to add that the cover with Oprah and Michelle is simply smashing and stunning.Chic Noirhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02658431620319643962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-20272699763255311402012-04-12T23:24:03.784-04:002012-04-12T23:24:03.784-04:00Thank you Chic Noir for your visit and the links :...Thank you Chic Noir for your visit and the links :)Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-78094911552872704812012-04-12T22:52:40.818-04:002012-04-12T22:52:40.818-04:00Ok and and two more
http://youtu.be/SEwJHq0Z8gU
...Ok and and two more<br /><br /> http://youtu.be/SEwJHq0Z8gU<br /><br />http://youtu.be/hyxmdswjjXM<br /><br />I hate how blk women are portrayed in the media now. Really I think most of us should just stay away from people weilding mikes and cameras.Chic Noirhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02658431620319643962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-11437805297793283712012-04-12T22:38:10.596-04:002012-04-12T22:38:10.596-04:00Hello saw your blog on clutch(a blog I'm start...Hello saw your blog on clutch(a blog I'm starting to want to aviod) about blk women are sexy but not beautiful. I can't wait to dig into more of your posts.<br /><br />I just wanted to add some links from youtube where you can see many blk models from the 80's and 90's walking for high end brands looking very elegant and "very blk". <br /><br />chloe http://youtu.be/vIi0HCwkETcChic Noirhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02658431620319643962noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-4115180627928899282012-04-08T22:39:43.851-04:002012-04-08T22:39:43.851-04:00To Anonymous,
I hope that you are not being facet...To Anonymous,<br /><br />I hope that you are not being facetious with that question. A Ph.D. would dress like the rest of his or her colleagues probably business casual or business attire, not as though they were going to the gym. Some wear t-shirts and jeans for lectures but others dress in more professional attire. For public lectures they dress more professionally. At work sites outside the university they follow dress codes the same as in any other profession which is usually business professional. <br /><br />I know this as these people are my colleagues. If the Ph.D. mentioned above wants to be treated with the respect he deserves he should dress like someone in a respected profession like his colleagues instead of like his students. He's probably trying to "keep it real" and fit in with men who don't consider his to be "one of them" anyway since he became a doctor anyway. Or he has not accepted his high status role yet.Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-36990730081896746732012-04-08T21:47:27.529-04:002012-04-08T21:47:27.529-04:00How does one look like a Ph.D?How does one look like a Ph.D?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-69092327732805479482012-04-08T13:20:39.817-04:002012-04-08T13:20:39.817-04:00I have to respectfully disagree with 'Cee'...I have to respectfully disagree with 'Cee' on this statement, "I think that feminine and girly was never a Black thing but think about why. BW have been ascribed to this notion that BW CANNOT be feminine or girly from slavery."<br /><br />I've done a lot of reading of Black history, seen thousands of images of women of African heritage (both here and abroad) through the centuries, and have also seen the realities of the glamor/femininity my own Black female family members put forward. <br /><br />Feminine and girly behavior/style has always been nearly as much intertwined with the lives of Black women as it has with any other type of woman. It's definitely true that historically, for many women of color, their experiences have been more difficult, but femininity has always been an integral attribute amongst them. <br /><br />Things like sewing, makeup, hair care, beauty and style have always been cherished by Black women. One can only open up an old Black magazine like "Ebony" and see the pictures of women of the day and beauty ads geared towards the Black woman.<br /><br />There were for the more middle class African-American women, beauty & etiquette schools owned and ran by other Black women. These taught girls to be young ladies in all areas of life, i.e. manners, posture, language, deportment.<br /><br />My grandmother was always the height of femininity. She wouldn't leave the house without gloves, a hat, and a nice outfit. <br /><br />There were cotillions and debutante balls exclusively for young African-American women. I know this because I've read about these affairs and my own mother and aunt were a part of them. My mom was a sub-debutante in a cotillion in the 70's - there's a picture of her in my Flickr album, in a gown my grandmother made especially for the occasion.<br /><br />All of this history demonstrates that despite the unfair, unrealistic garbage racists spread about the image of Black people/Black women, countless Black women did indeed celebrate, promote, and treasure feminine ideals for themselves and their daughters. They were no different from any other lady.Victoria Gracehttps://twitter.com/#!/MyVintageSoulnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-77258993904147679712012-04-07T18:33:46.351-04:002012-04-07T18:33:46.351-04:00Thanks BWLivingWell :) I like your blog too!
I lo...Thanks BWLivingWell :) I like your blog too!<br /><br />I loved what you said, "We should all be asking ourselves what benefits us and what doesn't benefit us in the long run and make the appropriate adjustments. How has the "strong, hard, independent Black woman" instead of the "feminine, delicate, elegant Black woman" benefited some black women the last few decades??"<br /><br />This is the mentality that I have and that I write about on this blog. I do what works and try to stop things that don't. I don't degrade or humiliate myself though. I just learned being nice, not complaining all the time, being open to new things, and striving for better things has worked for me so I refuse to stop. Frowning, acting moody, isolating myself, and dressing like a slop got me NOWHERE and gave me NO BENEFITS that I actually needed. <br /><br />What White or Black people think crosses my mind but it doesn't stop me. I put what I need and what works ahead of those thoughts. It's really helpful when I really think about my fears of racism and rejection by Black people and how they hold me back. Once I recognize those things then I can push them aside and get on with my life! That's what I think successful people do when they defy the odds!<br /><br />See you again soon :)Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-9691583452622321172012-04-07T17:44:05.072-04:002012-04-07T17:44:05.072-04:00Excellent post Elegance! Looking forward to readi...Excellent post Elegance! Looking forward to reading more from you :)<br /><br />I posted a portion of your post on Tumblr and I'm not surprised at the "acting brand new" comments from some of the black women. They want to turn this into an argument about feminism and white supremacy.....*rolls eyes* Notice how any conversation that is attempted to improve the behavior or appearance of black people, in this case black women, ends in derailments from the indoctrinated among us.<br /><br />We should all be asking ourselves what benefits us and what doesn't benefit us in the long run and make the appropriate adjustments. How has the "strong, hard, independent Black woman" instead of the "feminine, delicate, elegant Black woman" benefited some black women the last few decades?? *crickets*BWLivingWellhttp://bwlivingwell.tumblr.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-788247236906826630.post-14459553824661244132012-04-07T16:19:53.615-04:002012-04-07T16:19:53.615-04:00Hi E. Wilson :) Thanks for your visit! I agree, pe...Hi E. Wilson :) Thanks for your visit! I agree, people have to realize that what they wear sends a message to other people about what type of music you like, how you feel about yourself (e.g., low self-esteem, depression etc.), and what you are doing with your life (e.g., student, professional etc.). This has always been the case and wishing it away will not work. <br /><br />Hi Cee,<br />Well I think that based on this post I disagree. Black people did not come into existence during the Atlantic Slave Trade. They existed before that in Africa where women were feminine and they were treated like women. Black girls and women in Africa today look like women because of the way they dress and act, not like men even if they wear their hair short. <br /><br />I don't let notions of what White people thought during slavery interfere with my life today (I doubt that White people worry about it). We have to stop relating everything we do to slavery and White people and instead strive for helpful ideals regardless of race. To do otherwise is self-defeating, depressing, and a self-fulfilling prophesy (i.e., you expect that people won't treat you like a lady so you don't bother trying to be one). <br /><br />It sounds like it bothers you that people judge others by their clothing, but that's reality. People have always done this. People will readily admit that they dress a certain way to send a message, yet when others react negatively they say that's prejudiced. People have a choice to wear whatever they want and not think about the consequences or choose clothing they like that sends a message that is beneficial to them. Colleagues of your professor friend may pull him aside and tell him he does not look professional and that his colleagues don't take him seriously. He will have to decide if he is okay with that or if it's better to dress like a professor in order to advance his career. If you are a Ph.D. why wouldn't you want to look like one? <br /><br />I am not imposing ideas on anyone, they are free to choose whatever they want to wear and they can choose to act however they want. They just have to accept the consequences for their actions instead of always pointing the finger at everyone else.Elegancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06086459974594918860noreply@blogger.com